Every Fall my brother (Tommy) and his best friends (Joseph, Robert, and Nick) have a Holiday photoshoot at Target. Now that it's starting to get cold, they are starting to plan their next photoshoot! Here's last years:
Hey, I'm Krista and I'm one of the new interns at Hot 99.5's The Kane Show. Here is a little excerpt from my future autobiography! :)
….An excerpt from the New York Times Bestseller Autobiography: Socially Sober. By Krista Catalfamo.
It is the year 2027, and I’ve made it. I am the second ever, head female writer for Saturday Night Live. Tina Fey, my children’s godmother, was the first ever head female writer for SNL. Lauren Michaels, creator of SNL, recently put me in charge of Weekend Update. Tina and I are going to be co-anchors. Some older fans of SNL will be really happy to see her back in action. I hope Jimmy Fallon will take some time out and make a few appearances.
My journey to success has been long, stressful, and extremely rewarding. It all started back when I was living in Northern Virginia. Yes, I had to clarify that I lived in Northern Virginia. It’s very different from the rest of Virginia, far superior and much more traffic. Not to toot my own horn but I attended the number one community college in America: Northern Virginia Community College…toot, toot. While at NVCC I was an intern for The Kane Show on Hot 99.5..pretty cool, eh?! I eventually did go to George Mason University and majored in Theatre Arts.
The day after Graduation I packed my bags and headed to Chicago, my own personal Disney World. I moved up there with my GBF (Gay Best Friend), we got the most horrible little apartment above a Pub. It was cheap, so it was perfect, and of course we always wanted to know what it was like to be starving artists. It was cool to be poor back in 2015. There were people called “Hipsters”, they took the un-cool and made it cool, but once it got cool it was no longer cool. My GBF (who shall remain anonymous because you’ll drop this e-book and go read his e-book because he is way more fabulous than I am) and I were wannabe hipsters, so we always tried to be cool by being un-cool.
After a few days, I took all my tip money from working 3 years at Starbucks, and enrolled in a few classes at the Second City. I took improvisational classes, and sketch writing classes. Those classes, my peers, my teachers, everything that was the Second City changed my life. I’ve never had so much fun in my life. One night my improv troupe and I rented out the theatre to test out our skills. Of course, none other than former teen idol Nick Jonas was in the audience. He stayed after the show to introduce himself. It would have been love at first sight if I hadn’t of met him when I was 16 at a meet and greet at a Jonas Brothers concert.
We got married and moved to his place in New York City. Just because I was a Jonas now, I still wanted to prove myself as an actress/comedian/writer. So I took the next logical step in my career, I became a page at NBC. I would be around NBC talent all the time, so I could force them to fall in love with my charm. I was scrubbing the mens toilets one day (NBC corporate had to fire the janitor staff due to them being apart of the mafia) and in comes Lauren Michaels. I drop everything and stand next to him at the urinals (which were spotless, thank you very much). I start performing my stand up routine right then and there. He was a little freaked out, almost called security until I showed him my badge, and then asked me to come up to his office to talk. The rest is history…or well, I ended up getting on the writing staff of SNL.
Do you like what you’ve read so far? Get your own Digital Copy at Amazon.com to read all of it!
Follow me on Twitter, @KristaJayne
"Good am! It's Monday.. Here's a quote: The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it. - Chinese Proverb"
Cat Eats With Fork Video, Courtesy of The Huffington Post. You are welcome.
There's only 99 Sleeps Till Christmas! Thanks @OfficialSanta
✰✰✰ 14 WEEKS TO CHRISTMAS EVE ✰✰✰
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